I was out on a Saturday night at some lame club that my friend dragged me too. I approached two different girls but it was just so loud that I couldn’t hear anything. The conversations died out quickly.
On my way home I was still in the mood to talk to girls since I couldn’t do it at the club. An opportunity presented itself when I went down the escalator of the subway and saw a pretty girl standing alone.
I couldn’t have made it more obvious that I was going to approach after I positioned myself right next to her, but there was no “smooth” way around it.
I waited no more than five seconds. Any longer and I just would’ve started to psych myself out. She was in what seemed to be gym shorts so I said, “It doesn’t seem like you went out tonight.”
“Actually I did but I changed so I wouldn’t look like a whore on the way home.”
Now that’s called “giving encouragement,” where the girl gives a rich answer that lets me take the conversation all sorts of places. My subsequent comments were about the weekend being amateur hour and the horrible club I just came from. She took out a packet of gum and I asked for a piece.
The train came and she went in first. I was very casual about the whole thing as there was less urgency to fill every silence since there were no distractions like in a bar. Once inside the train I sat near her.
She had a smart ass sense of humor so it was easy to tease her, about her young age and the mosquito bites on her legs. I jokingly asked if she was “intimidated to be talking to an older man,” one of my favorite lines. She responded by asking my age.
“What stop do you get off?” I said. I wanted to see how much more time I had. It wasn’t much so I decided to go for the number. Nine times out of ten, based on the fun conversation we had and her asking me a personal question, I’m getting a number.
In fact I thought the number was such a sure thing that I was already thinking of logistics on how to get out this college girl who doesn’t have a car.
I told her we should hang out for a drink and her reply was, “Haha no.” She laughed at me. There was other passengers around and they all saw this, though they did not make a noise.
I said, “Wow, well, you could have lied and said you had a boyfriend.”
“Well I do have a boyfriend, blah blah blah.”
The stop came and I smiled and told her to have a good night. There’s no point in getting upset, especially since this approach will make it easier for me to do more subway approaches. After a few minutes the burn of her rejection in front of a small crowd wore off and I felt fine.
Now I’m more motivated to chat up girls on the subway since I know the odds are in my favor. 98% of guys never even ask a girl for her number on the subway.
There are two types of guys: those who let rejection get them down and those who use it as fuel to feed the fire. I’m the latter, because I know that part of the game is a numbers game. For every couple rejections there is a success. If you stop at a rejection then you stopped too soon.