Here are ten of my best tips to get you started on your quest.
1. Throw logic out the window. It’s tempting to want to use logic in attracting women, but if that was the case you would have guys everywhere with t-shirts stating their penis size and income, and get laid like rock stars. But we don’t really see that and it’s not true that the richer the guy is the more play he gets. Instead you have to understand that women are emotional beings who do things like spend hours shopping for shoes and watching soap operas and talk shows, responding to things that a guy would not respond to with many triggers that aren’t obvious and clear-cut. They do not think like you do.
2. Work out. You may think this is a cliche but there is no other sure-fire confidence booster than working on your body. It doesn’t have to be weight lifting either; it can be simply running or biking. Focus on something that improves your health and look so you feel better when it’s time to hit on girls.
3. Expose yourself to interesting things. It’s hard to maintain a several hour long conversation if you are not an interesting person, and the only way to get interesting is by doing interesting things. Take up a new hobby, travel to an exotic location for a couple weeks, or simply grab a handful of recommended books at the bookstore and start reading and thinking about them. The more positive experiences you have, the more things you’ll be able to talk to women which increases attraction.
4. Suck it up and learn how to approach. Unless you are a celebrity who gets approached all the time, you’re cutting yourself short by not approaching. Approaching women is the number one way to get a lot more women than you would have gotten if you simply waited for girls to approach you. Sure sometimes girls will approach me but that’s too much of a passive strategy based on luck.
5. Learn how to use routines. Most of the conversation you have with a girl will be natural and fresh, but think of how much farther you would get if you had a few stories that you know would get a positive reaction? What you want to do is think of a couple stories that happened in your life that a girl would find interesting, and find a way to squeeze that into a conversation during the first 30 minutes or so. This allows you to show the best of you within a short amount of time.
6. It’s all about the niche. There is nothing wrong with looking like everyone else and going where everyone else goes. You can still get laid that way, but it’s easier if you find your own look, and easier if you find a place that meshes will with that look and your vibe as well. You want to find a niche that optimizes the process so you don’t have to compete with a whole bunch of guys that on the surface seem very similar to you. Stop doing what everyone else is doing and stand out to get more natural attention. Let girls be curious about you before you even open your mouth.
7. Always be closing. The girl is not going to close herself. While some girls may offer her number before you ask for it, it’s still going to be up to you to have a plan on getting her phone number, asking her out on dates, and getting her inside a bedroom. Think of the whole process as climbing a ladder, but it must be you working your way up the ladder to get to the top. Never wait for a girl to allow herself to be laid by you. Sure you will get rejected along the way sometimes, but that’s the price you have to pay. Speaking of rejection…
8. Learn from rejection. You will get rejected dozens and dozens of times in the next year if you really make the decision to be a player. Over 90% of girls you initially talk to will not be attracted to you in any way, shape, or form, but it takes getting rejected by that 90% to get the 10% that you do hook up with or have sex with. Each time you get rejected just take a second to think about a way you could have made the interaction better, then go out there again on the next girl.
9. Focus on indirect game instead of direct. Once you get your game together you can start thinking about going up to girls and telling them you think they are cute, but until then you want to focus on indirect game where you pose some sort of innocuous question or situation to get a conversation going. For instance if you are at a coffee shop and a girl you like is next to you reading your book, you can ask her if the book is any good. By going indirect you don’t force the girl to make quick decision on if she likes you or not since you’re just being chatty.
10. Don’t take things seriously. Approaching girls and getting laid is nothing but a game is just like any other hobby. Sometimes it stops being a game when you meet the right girl but the lighter you approach being a player the better your results will be. Every time you get rejected you should have a smirk on your face because in the end it really does not matter. Just go after what you want, learn from your rejections, and go out there again. With hard enough work, things fall into place.